This Ain't Now

A quick update on what is fast becoming the most annoying aspect of Sportscenter: Who's Now. Uh, is it "...not your typical bracket?" Is Muhammed Ali "the Greatest of All-Time?" Do Michael Wilbon, Kirk Herbstreit, and Keyshawn Johnson have anything, and I mean ANYTHING, interesting to say?

I'm not sure what irks me more: than inane chatter between these three and Stuart Scott or the intentionally over dramatic female voice-over during each athlete's highlights. Here's a typical moment: when discussing Vince Young and Maria Sharapova, Stuart Scott opines, "...but he won six games in a row!" Wow, Stuart. Six? In a row? Was he a rookie too? Johnson consistently makes extremely astute comments like, "NASCAR is up-and-coming." Stop the presses!

The absurdity of this exercise became all too apparent in the closest vote yet, when LaDainian Tomlinson beat David Beckham. Beckham could have retired three years ago and still should have beat Tomlinson. Like I said a previous post, I don't think I'd recognize Tomlinson begging for nickels on the street corner unless he was wearing a helmet.

Here's how it looks now if, unlike me, you care:

MICHAEL JORDAN REGION
July 1: (1) Tiger Woods def. (8) Matt Leinart (90% - 10%)
July 2: (4) Dwyane Wade def. (5) Shaun White (73% - 27%)
July 3: (2) LaDainian Tomlinson def. (7) David Beckham (50.8% - 49.2)
July 4: (3) Steve Nash def. (6) Serena Williams (57% - 43%)

MUHAMMAD ALI REGION
July 5: (1) Peyton Manning def. (8) Amanda Beard (80.5% - 19.5%)
July 6: (4) Dale Earnhardt Jr. def. (5) Chuck Liddell (61.7% - 38.3%)
July 7: (2) Alex Rodriguez def. (7) Terrell Owens (67.5% - 32.5%)
July 8: (3) Kobe Bryant def. (6) Ronaldinho (60.8% - 39.2%)

BILLIE JEAN KING REGION
July 9: (1) LeBron James def. (8) Kelly Slater (84.4 % - 15.6%)
July 10: (4) Jeff Gordon def. (5) Barry Bonds (62.2% - 37.8%)
July 11: (2) Derek Jeter def. (7) Sidney Crosby (63.8% - 36.2%)
July 12: (3) Reggie Bush def. (6) Danica Patrick (72.5% - 27.5%)

BABE RUTH REGION
July 13: (1) Tom Brady def. (8) David Ortiz (66.1% - 33.9%)
July 14: (4) Maria Sharapova def. (5) Vince Young (60% - 40%)
July 15: (2) Roger Federer vs (7) Tony Parker
July 16: (3) Shaquille O'Neal vs (6) Michael Phelps

Straight chalk. Tune in and be bored to tears or do what I do: Change the channel during this tripe. In case you were wondering who is going to win, let me be the one to tell you (Caution: Spoiler ahead). Tiger Woods. Matt Leinart must have cajoled every one of his purported girlfriends to vote for him in order to tally even 10% in that match-up.