Soccered Out

What you see on the right here is one of many very good reasons why soccer will never make it in the U.S. Well, a version of it. In the Ivory Coast v. Brazil game, Kaka was sent to the showers for having the audacity to let a guy run into him. You can see the real version HERE.

If the U.S. hadn't come up with a miracle goal in stoppage time the other day they'd be sitting at home right now, and we'd be discussing how they had not one, but two goals taken away from them by the referees. Unfortunately, this sort of thing tends to be the rule rather than the exception in soccer. And that's usually the adjective used, "unfortunate," as in "...that was an unfortunate call."

How about "ridiculous?" If some crazy call boots the U.S. in the game against Ghana (as it did the last time they played in the World Cup), we'll see how many people are all giddy about soccer.

U.S. fans, and especially the owners of the teams, simply wouldn't put up with shoddy officiating of this sort. There's a reason they use instant replay in practically every major sport now. Diva players taking swan dives would be mercilessly ridiculed. Guys rolling around on the field like they just got slapped with a shovel - no.

Grow up and we might consider calling you football, soccer. And ditch the freakin' horns already.

WHITEY'S TAKE:
Whitey checked the lunar schedule for the 25th. It's Whitey's day away from the baseball diamond, and he's looking for something to do. Golf? Pops is doing some project with his crew, and it's too hot to go play without him. So what could be relaxing?

Whitey headed out and clicked on the TV, and there it was: Portugal v. Brazil. Puss-Puss (Whitey's Cat) was begging for her morning fix of tuna. What she doesn't know is that she's getting her pill. However, she probably does need a 12 step program.

So Whitey's mind was still studying on the days activities because there was an uncomfortable feeling. Something Whitey couldn't put his finger on. Whitey poured himself a cup of Jaun's Best Bean and went to the chair. No more than two minutes in and yellow cards start flying. It's a chippy nil-nil match, and the announcers are speaking gibberish. But there it was, the answer for a relaxing day.

These soccer players remind me of a fish out of water when they bump into each other. "Quick, bring the gurney!" Wait two minutes later...he's back playing. Really. Whitey's goin' fishin'! If I go nil for the day, at least I'll move the worm back and forth without the medics working on my jig. And my ride home is gonna take me to a better place than where the North Korean soccer squad is headed.